Uniquely unUnique

Victory lane

I won the twilight 'cross here in Savannah on saturday night and my buddys, in good dirt track car racing form mock interviewed me after the race, which is a joke only if you've been to dirt track car racing and witnessed America at its finest.  Here is the formula:

1. Thank your tireless mechanic for making the machine tip top
2. Talk about the tires hooking up and how the track surface changed
3.  tell the chump's you beat they raced real good and be real modest, say you had a lot of fun
4. Rattle off your list of sponsors, which should include a autobody shop, your wife and Jesus.

This guy is pro:

Then I did some burn outs (after I thanked the big guy in the sky).

Thoughts on the Georgia Cross scene:  it seems so young/small-this small? really?/ courses are pretty good/promoters don't know how to set up pits (should be longer than 5 bike lengths)/ Wow, these are slow starts compared to MAC or UCI races/ 1 race every 2 weeks/ driving 4 hours for that one race/ Good core crew/lots of room for growth/ down-home feel.

If you're up there in Mid Atlantic or New England (hi Meg!) be real thankful for what you've got. I'm totally gunning for nationals, but honestly I don't know if racing down here is really preparing me.

Two weeks of school left, then 6 weeks off.

Nice to meet you again

My girlfriend has been away for over a week now, with another week to go. I'm a pretty independent person, so I sort like the by myself parts of life as much as I enjoy the opposite.  What this really means is that I eat tons of frozen thin crust pizzas topped with hot sauce and a side glass of OJ.  Which I guess really really means nothing is all that different than when she is here.

Now that I'm not racing full time in the fall, like I have been for the last 7 or 8 years, I basically pulled an all nighter on halloween being Dale the asshole hickster.  I don't just dress up, I pull on a full character that pretty much is my uninhibited self calling everyone a pussy and talking about buck huntin.  The best costume was Nacho Libre, f'ing spot on costume, body type and face.

So that was fun.  But I still miss destroying myself on the bike twice a weekend.

I live in the south

And thus I get to read these sorts of gems from the local cycling listserv. This one in response to a stolen bike:

Sounds like the same MO as the nigletts who "traded up" at Bicycle Link a couple of months ago.
 
 Somewhere in Kenya a village is missing its idiot!
 

This is repulsive to me on three levels: 1. this dude is a douchebag  and throws that thinking around like it ain't no thing, and will post it in a public forum 2. That half the guys on the listserv here find nothing wrong with this 3. he rides a triathaloner bike on group rides, mostly in the aerobars.

I know that most of what triathaloners do is embarrassing and repelling to most civilized people, but can this be blamed simply on the triathaloner status?

no.

he's a southern triathaloner person. And one who looks like an overstuffed sausage in his cycling kit. Go figure.

Anyway, in news that doesn't suck, I won another GA cyclocross race. Even after getting my ass handed to me HARD in cincinnati, and with only 3 rides in 2 weeks, I managed to win a really fun course (think Charm city course).  Racing on the state/local level is a world of difference between UCI racing. But I'll take it.

My new cannondale bike is wicked awesome, too.

this is happening again

For some reason I pay for this blog to happen, and  didn't update billing info. Now its updated, and so I shall weblog.

Cyclingnews broke Vandenbroucke's balls so hard for so long, now he's turned up horizontal and they have be all polite.  You know they are hating behind all that fluff.

So I got this 'cross bug up my ass last week and just had to drive 10 f'ing hours to the Cinci Cross festival. I've been up there a few times before with really good results in some really well run races and good courses.  So i drive up there with my buddy R to teach him the way of 'cross (with the help of Minturn).  I got my ASS KICKED.  It was an exercise in eating a heaping pile of humble pie: starting position of dead last, no UCI points, legs of fried chicken, low on the totem pole and having absolutely no conversation with my old pal.  One of the best things I've learned from cycling is learning how to lose, which you typically do lots of.  Before this turns into some inspirational poster BS about learning to lose, I'll stop it at this: I have  long way to go before conquering nationals this December.

Speaking of: my uber-high tuition has some rewards, like a rec department thats kicking down a flight for me to race in Bend in December!

I started tweeting or whatever. That lasted about 3 days.

 

morning on laughing horse lake, Montana

Bigger and smarty

So technically I'm in grad school now, although not currently in term for the summer.  So technically I should be reading and sketching and kicking ass like a good student.  I haven't even touched a pencil except to cut 2x4s and tiles at work, let alone pick up a Copic to make some hotness (which I can't really do anyway, yet).  But I am a wicked strong flatland rider currently, thanks to a pretty good amount of time behind the motorcycle.  I can do breakaway efforts like never before. I wouldn't even have to beat Myerson in cyclocross sprints anymore.

But this isn't really about how awesome I am, cause you know that already.  This about BIGGER FASTER STRONGER, which is, IMHO (big ups to my man Sachs!) is a good documentary (if you have netflix, you can watch it on demand via your computer, or hook it up to your tv like we do).  Watch the trailer:

Now I think pretty much anyone with muscles is on the juice.  It's to be expected, really. We're human and competitive.  Winners get more pussy, right?  I was lured into considering that steriods weren't so bad, as the documentarian leads you down a path of questioning the validity of concern.  A lot of points he makes are pretty valid and interesting, from Air Force pilots (on the uppers) to loser wrestlers.  He interviews Floyd and that ridiculous guy with the huge arms(watch trailer). 

You guys all righteous about anti doping and calling out everyone-don't bother commenting.  Its gotten quite boring really.

Milla just purchased one of these badgirls, 40+mpg booyah!

I just realized Thomas Voeckler looks a lot my old teammate Boyd.
Poor Thomas.

Riding in july feels special, feels better. The tour is just so beautiful.

hicksters vs hipster

I read this bicycle design blog and for a while that dude started every.single.post with something like 'i'm so busy I can't write too much, but here goes...'

I'm not that guy.  But somehow school is over, summer kicked in and I find myself being a handyman from 9-5, sweating balls off all day then jump on the bike for 3 hours, eat then sleep.  That simple little algorithm has made this summer just fly by. 

Plus, I'm starting to get annoyed with every hipster design kid trying to redesign a bike for 'normal' people or some super amazing new and highly improbable commuter bike that will change the face of America once and for all.  I love to make fun of hipsters as much as any of us (since you are probably a hipster, too, right? I mean who isn't?) and the most satisfying hipster bitch-slap happened at a lecture earlier this year by a researcher from Ideo.  She basically said during the development of the Shimano Coast system, they realized that people where sorta freaked out walking into a bike shop and being told by some tattooed hipster kid that they needed this and that in a bike.  At that moment, the sea of hipsters (all dying to show their cred, tight jeans and cute obscure cap) froze, and some coughed.  Hopefully their thick-with-irony persona allowed them a small personal snicker.

That was a highly tangential rant about nothing.

So I rocked a cannonball trip up to PA for a surprise family visit[slash]Trans Rockies training camp in my beloved Rothrock and newly beloved Raystown Lake trails.  Holy DANG! 32 miles of the most fun singletrack-I swear 30 miles of it is downhill.  If you get a chance to make a day trip, don't hesitate.  Plus you get to watch complete hicksters drive either faux cigarette boats or pontoon boats around the lake.  You know how fun it is to stop on a ride and start making fun of people you don't know or understand.

Ohh-and I got to ride a stage of the Tour de Burg. Next time its gotta be the whole stage race, but hopefully I don't have to get a hideous haircut like the locals.  Look for an article in Bike mag sometime in the future.  Although Vanity Fair and The Economist are the only magazines worth reading, really.

I'd totally give you my weekend TSS and average power and modified beefcake outputs but, NOBODY CARES.  But more importantly: I had a super fun time with some of my favorite people (chipper, dr.thorne and richie rich the pussy bitch).  And I saw a rattlesnake.

Remember: the best parts of bike riding you just can't quantify.

Riff raff

My trip to the darkside continues and with pretty good results. I came somewhat close to winning the GA master's criterium championship yesterday. 2nd ain't so bad, especially considering I tried a solo bridge to 2 in the break and I'm pretty crappy when it comes to breakaways.  I went Shogren style and doubled up races and actually raced the Pro-1-2 well (9th) but lacked any sprint snap when it counted.  Its all training for Trans Rockies, minus the mountains, mountain bike, trails and long, long days.

We have a nice little garden of herbs, arugula, spinach, tomatoes and compost-heap pumpkins.  Keeping the pests at bay is more difficult than I thought, but we're using Neem oil and dish soap.

I'm more tan than I've ever been (not saying much).

I got a letter of concern from one friend regarding another:

I dont know him well enough, but your buddy Myerson is bragging on his blog about how much money he is making as a professional cyclist in America. It is like a recorded loop of a person misusing a word in public, for everybody to hear. The feeling of embarrassment I get in my stomach on his behalf kind of hurts.  I know he is your friend, so maybe you can subtly tell him that he is like the man in section 8 housing with gold teeth?
Thank you

No comment on this matter. But I see a connection here.